Confidence

Confidence is developed through action! If you would like to grow in confidence here are some things that you can start today.

I’m sitting at my computer looking outside my window the sun is shining the birds are singing. I have a coffee to my left and a glass of water to my right. The thing I appreciate the most about time is we can learn more about who we are, what we want and what we need and today I need both coffee and water! Sometimes we can have a one or the other mindset, but what if it can be this and that? Let me share an example with you: I feel insecure, and I am confident. It may seem contradicting so let me unpack this a little further. I am confident because I am willing to have a go or learn something new, even if it feels uncomfortable. I feel insecure because of the circumstance that I find myself in. Just because I feel insecure, does it mean that I am not confident?

My aim is to present to you confidence in a light that will empower you, remind you of how wonderful you truly are and the capacity that is within you. So how about we start with what we think “confidence” is? Take a moment to think about what confidence is for you. Is there someone who comes to mind that embodies confidence, do you believe people are born confident or is it something that we develop?

Confidence is a belief in oneself, the conviction that one has the ability to meet life’s challenges and to succeed—and the willingness to act accordingly. Being confident requires a realistic sense of one’s capabilities and feeling secure in that knowledge. This definition comes from psychology today, and there is so much to think about here. I have turned these into five questions that you can ask yourself:

  1. What if what you believe about yourself is ultimately up to you?

By no means does this undermine what your journey has been up to this point. Sometimes when we are vulnerable, we may take on what others have said about us and make it our truth. In my practice, this is one of the things that I get to do with clients.  We look at core beliefs, validate feelings, determine if it’s true or helpful and then replace it with a new belief.

  1. What is your conviction about your ability to face challenges and succeed?

The past can be a great place of reference, and sometimes looking back can help us move forward. Looking at past challenges that you’ve overcome or areas of success no matter how big or small can remind you of your capacity and build confidence.

  1. What would it look like if you were willing to simply have a go?

I wonder if we do better when we have to the space to do better. Sometimes we can get in our own way with critical self-talk or standards of perfection. Having a go is maintaining a sense of excellence without the added pressure that can be counterproductive.

  1. What would it look like if you were to own your strengths, and to define areas of development?

Understanding yourself and capabilities can be liberating. By doing so, it can create a sense of appreciation for what you bring to the table and also allow room to grow confidence in certain areas and build momentum.

  1. What is it going to take for you to accept who you are?

Do you ever catch yourself saying when I… then I will…? (I know I do) What if acceptance is a continual choice! If you were to use the this and that exercise what would it be? For example, I accept who I am in this moment, and I am on a journey of growth.

Confidence is developed through action! If you would like to grow in confidence here are some things that you can start today:

  • Commit to the process even when it might feel like you are out of your comfort zone
  • Repetition is the key
  • Assess the results and celebrate your progress why wait until the end
  • Be kind to yourself
  • Learn from others and ask questions if you feel stuck
  • Remind yourself of your capacity and previous achievements
  • Take the time to celebrate the wins both big and small

Food for thought, what is something new that you’ve learnt about yourself and your capacity?